Happy Mother’s Day: Know your children

know your children

When she looks at me, she sees me, and nothing else matters

I once received an email from a provocative and unconventional soul dear to me, quoting Don Juan Matus saying how all humans can be put into one of the three categories: the urines (also called the ‘golden piss’), the farts and the vomits. This is the resume of how Don Juan describes the three categories.
The urines are the nice people who take care of you, pamper you and always want to do you a favor. They assume that everybody is as nice as them and  because of that they are always hurt, disappointed, and tearful.
The farts are the opposite, they are irritating and self-sufficient, imposing and constantly in your face. They try to use you as much as possible, they are natural teachers and leaders, and would do anything to stay in power.
The vomits are in-between, and as such they are neither imposing nor will they be led. They are show-offs and give the impression that they are something great. But, if you do not pay any attention to them, they are undone by their insignificance.
The provocative and unconventional soul dear to me ended his email by asking me which one am I. Then he added he knew I was a golden piss 🙂
Which one are you?
If you feel offended by the question (just like I was at first 🙂 ), you are caught up in self-importance. Self-importance is all this energy we put into being concerned with our personal appearance and into what others think and feel about us. Self-importance consumes much of our energy. We are taught ‘self-importance’ from the youngest age. And in being important, we start losing the “self”…

So how are we, the generation of important humans (with the lost “self”), raising our children, the future of humanity? Let’s see…

Many pregnant mothers (and fathers) are encouraged to spend time talking to their babies growing in their belly so they can connect with them before they are born. But, all that the developing little human hears all of the time is their pregnant mother (and father if he is around). The little baby eats the food their mother eats, feels what she feels and thinks her thoughts. Their little soul wants a break… What nobody teaches us to do is to stop and listen. If we want to get to know our little one, we gotta stop talking and listen. Ask questions and listen for answers, listen for their breath and the beat of their little heart. This is when our importance takes a back seat to someone else’s importance.
(Hint: We gain the access to our lost self by doing the same, stop the internal talk and listen… for own breath and own heart beat.)

I have several kids in my life who would occasionally call me ‘mom’ when visiting in my home. Now, this is not because they do not have loving moms – they do! This is because I make the time for them and give them my full attention. I take the time to ask questions and listen for their answers. I get to know what they like and don’t like, what makes them happy and sad, who their good friends are and who they are having trouble with, I listen to their dreams and their nightmares, I know their favorite animals, colors, foods, what they are good at and where they are struggling. I take the time to play their games, and have fun with it. I praise them for their qualities and encourage them to express who they are freely and comfortably.
When you really know your child, you know their soul and you see their path. And you raise them equipped to follow that path. Not to follow what society wants for them, not to follow what you want for them. And I am not talking about allowing them to do anything they want, behave in any way they want and be whoever they want to be. I am talking about accompanying them in being the best they can be. That asks for a lot of your energy, your attention and much of your time. Motherhood asks for all of who you are, so your children can be all of who they are. And that is certainly not the urine, the fart or the vomit 🙂 .

I often get asked if I was raised in the family of healers, or if my parents were shamans. To which I say ‘no’ and ‘no’. There are many courageous people on both sides of my family, many are women, I learnt courage from them. I was raised by two people with huge and open hearts, so totally non-judgmental, who can love any child as their own and accept any person as their family. I learnt unconditional love from them. Through being in the right relationship with each other, they equipped me to be in the right relationship with all life and all spirit. By knowing me to the depth of my soul, they trust I am walking my path with integrity, passion and responsibility.
My mother may not understand exactly what I do, how I do it, or why I do it (there are so many more simpler, less consuming and better paid jobs out there 🙂 ). Yet when she looks at me she sees me and we both know that nothing else matters… I may be a golden piss at times, but she will always keep me in the highest regard and she will always remind me of my highest destiny. She is my biggest Hero and I love love love her every moment of every day of every year of my life. The life she gifted me with xox

13 thoughts on “Happy Mother’s Day: Know your children

  1. I don’t recall those three categories of Don Juan’s, but the notion of self-importance is a central theme. To think of yourself as fitting or having to fit into any of the above pissy categories is already instructive.

    • Yes, you are right, it’s not in any of Castaneda’s books. He mentions it in his interview in Psychology Today and in the book Encounters with the Nagual by Armando Torres… Yeah, having to fit yourself into one of the categories is definitely a great lesson in self-importance 🙂 I still remember the feeling inside when I read it the first time hahaha

      • But Don Juan had a number of those classifications – and all of them used comical language and they all simplified/reduced all of human psychology to a joke.

  2. Great post! I have learned this in the past several months. As I learn to be still and silent, I am readily able to listen to how the Universe speaks. I have three kids and with the last two pregnancies I would speak to them all the time because I wanted them to know who I was. We are coming to the end of our third pregnancy and I do not speak to this one. Why? My wife asked me several times and I told her because I do not need to speak. I can feel my child in her womb. I can sometimes sense his voice resonating from him. My wife tells me to place my hand on her belly because it calms him down when he is moving non-stop. With my other two, I wasn’t spiritually in tune as I am today. I am starting to see them as the are and not as society wants them to be and so I nourish them with love and encouragement.

    In regards to the urines, farts and vomits. I don’t think I’m any of them. I am nice and do others favors but don’t expect others to do the same. I think of myself as a good teacher and leader but I do not impose myself on anyone who does not want to be lead or be taught. I think of myself as great but I do not make sure others think the same. Whatever the perceive me to be is and what will be to them. I don’t take it personally. I’m here on my path. Learning what it is to be learned in this physical world. – An Awakened Soul 🙂

    • Wow thanks for sharing your experiences, much appreciated! I am so happy for you 🙂 Your children are fortunate to have you, as I am sure you are to have them as well. I wish you all the best with the third one, you must be excited to meet him soon! Much love to your family & blessings to you the Awakened soul xox
      p.s. as for (not) being tha urine, fart or vomit I take your words. Castaneda is a tough but great teacher, we may not all choose to learn from from him…

  3. I think I am more fortunate that they chose to be in our life. Castaneda has some great things to say and would resonate better with others but not so much with me. I do appreciate what he does though. Thank you for your love and blessings. I reciprocate. – An Awakened Soul

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